As a High-Achiever, Overachiever, & Perfectionist, it was very hard for me to take care of myself. I totally belonged to the “Put Yourself Last Club” at the expense of myself, and often wore this proudly as a badge. This happened in most arenas of my life: work, family, friends etc.
One time, it hit home more than any other time before. I would look into the eyes of my son, this beautiful gift I was given, and know he deserved not what was left over of me or what came in bits and pieces. I saw in his eyes the importance of me. The reason why I wanted to learn to give kindness, love, and patience to myself. I was his best teacher. He deserved to be a part of a life that would break the cycle and unrealistic expectations. High-Achieving, Overachieving & Perfectionism goes way back in my family history and it had robbed life from many of my family members in some way or another.
I realized the constant quest for external validation left me emptiness inside. I had to meet my emptiness and understand it. I had to make time for myself where I learned how to be still, how to care of myself, how to identify what false truths triggered and drove my need to be out of balance with High-Achieving, Overachieving and/or Perfectionism.
I had to learn to ‘Be’ vs ‘Do’. But ‘doing’ is what made me important and secure, wasn’t it? I had to learn how to be patient and kind to myself. I had to learn to love myself. If I depended on loving myself from others and external validation, then I would be disappointed often.
Why? Because we are all human and our human nature oftentimes hurts others in our lives. Most of the time the hurt is unintentional, but it still hurts.
I am truly at peace and living out my Personal Legend, the natural essence of what I was created to be and do. I am teaching my son these lessons. By all means that does mean that I do not have struggles, challenges or get out of balance. I am learning how to master focus. One of my greatest lessons thus far is “Every day look around and experience life. Let this be the balance and influence on your focus”.